Sunday, January 9, 2011

First Sign of Fear

When settling down for bed last night, Shaling indicated to Dad that she was afraid to sleep alone. She communicated this by putting her hand over her heart and flapping it quickly, to indicate her heart was beating fast. We weren't surprised by this, as we had been told she had probably never slept alone. We were actually more surprised the night before, when she fell asleep on her own.

For last night's purposes, we let the kids have one more night sleeping together (they had slept together the two weeks we were in China), but for tonight and the foreseeable future, I will sleep with her until we feel it is a good idea to start pushing her to sleep alone again.

I introduced her to Sunday school today, but cut out a bit early and did not stay for church, because I don't feel she is ready for big groups of people yet. You can just tell she is uncomfortable when people are trying to get to know her, but she can't really communicate with them yet. I also kept her at home with me this afternoon while Brock took Preston to sing at the dedication of the new intermediate school here in Rochester.

Grandma & Grandpa Barkley stopped by to meet Shaling today. Here she is with them:

They brought Christmas gifts with them and the kids enjoyed opening them:

My sister-in-law, Tanya, is a talented artist and sent along a 3-part wall hanging for Shaling's room. The Chinese symbols are Shaling's name.

The kids continue to do great together, so it will be interesting to see what happens tomorrow when Preston goes back to school, but Shaling stays home with Mom & Dad. We all continue to be on messed up sleep schedules, but Preston's is the closest to normal (which is fortunate). Thank goodness I don't have to go to work, because today was rough...I only slept for 3 hours last night. I got in a 2+ hour nap this afternoon, and am hoping to try and go to bed around 8ish tonight. I have to register Shaling for school tomorrow, even though we're not starting her yet.


  1. Sounds like you are doing well at home! She is a precious little one! So happy to follow and see your journey!
    Wow you sister in law could sooo sell those.. I would buy one! :)

  2. I hope God blesses her transition. It's so terrifying and lonely for these little ones. I remembered thinking that for our three, it was like they had been beamed by aliens to the one and nothing familiar from their old caregivers, new clothes, new foods, new possessions, new home, new friends, new school, new people and new ways they were required to behave. It's a long and bumpy ride ahead, but lots of joy as well. This is true faith and love in action.

    I especially hope God blesses your attachment. Ours all came with differing levels of RAD, but in the case where we were told there was the least hope, we've seen the most true attachment. God bless both of you on this crazy trip. If you need a word of encouragement, let us know. Bringing older children into the home is a unique experience.

  3. Thank you both for the words of encouragement!